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Why The Sniper Rocks

These past couple of weeks I have been lucky enough to test Star Wars: The Old Republic, and one thing has stood out for me like a decapitated thumb. No, it isn’t the escape pod your ship comes equipped with. Nor is it the ugly hammerhead sharks on Tython. It’s not even the way Darth Malgus makes me quiver behind my monitor. I’m talking about the incredibly awesomely epic Imperial Agent Sniper.

Sure, the Operative is also a suave Agent, but those of us who are going to be Snipers know that we are the best. In the galaxy. Period.

This article works better if you imagine a groovy beat as the soundtrack. And imagine that what I’m writing is said in a deep, silky smooth voice. Like the Agent himself.

1. Like my rifle? My rifle likes YOUR FACE!

One of the things that make MMOs awesome is when YOU are awesome. Everyone wants to reach that moment when they’re strolling down the glittering walkways of Coruscant, and all the other players turn their heads towards you and do a double take. “He’s awesome”, they think to themselves. “Yeah, I’m awesome”, you think to yourself.

And what better way to achieve this moment than to equip a massive sniper rifle! There you are, with it slung on your back. Then you hit your Z key, clasping it with your hands and whipping it in front of you in one clean motion. Everyone gasps.

Well, you’re already awesome, but let’s keep going.

2. Now you see me. Now you realise I’ve punched YOUR FACE!

Sure, several other classes, including the Operative, can go invisible. Cheap trickery! The sniper has to use skill to be stealthy. Barrel roll from cover to cover, flanking your prey until you’re happy with the odds. No one will see you coming. Mmm.

3. Magical abilities? How about I send a bolt flying at YOUR FACE!

It’s my favourite ability in the whole game (so far), and the Agent gets it at Level 1. Snipe. Cast time: 1 second. Range: 30 meters. “Shoots a target for 1 weapon damage. Can only be used from cover.” Just wait until you get in a PvP match and spam this thing. It makes the health bars shrink in fear. Why get up close and risk damage to your handsome features when you can Snipe? This is how you make the Republic cry like babies. Noob babies.

4. Oh, so you want to get personal? Here’s a vibroknife for YOUR FACE!

We may be most comfortable at yelling distance, but that doesn’t mean we don’t know how to whisper death. That’s right, we sheath a nice little vibroblade which we can use to smack’n’stun anyone who invades our personal bubbles. Even lightsabers don’t scare us. Jedi think they’re cool ’cause they’re all glowy … well we’re cool because we’re cool.

5. I’m a stylish blue man. With red eyes on MY FACE!

The Chiss are a fantastic race. That’s really all I have to say here. Why be a human when you can be a blue human with glowing red eyes? It’s a sure-fire way to intimidate all inhabitants of this Old Republic universe.

Basically, if you’re reading this and aren’t going to be an Imperial Agent, you’d better watch your back. And YOUR FACE!

About Thoroughmas

4 comments

  1. Thank you for this piece. i was on the fence about this class but you helped me figure out what i will be playing on launch day.

  2. Screw the Sith, Once more the agents will rule the Galaxy!!!

  3. Screw the Sith, Once more the agents will rule the Galaxy!!!

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    Good blog post, nice efforts. It couldn’t appear to have been penned any better. Reading this article piece of writing reminds me about my old boss! He usually kept babbling about this. I will email this post to him. Pretty confident he will probably have a high-quality read. Appreciate your posting!

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